Abandoned as a child, former cop Dawn Smikle turns pain into purpose

After being abandoned at a police station by her mother and spending years in state care, Dawn Smikle has turned her childhood trauma into a source of inspiration for others through her debut book, Grace Beyond Brokenness. Smikle’s difficult childhood began with her experience of being an outside child, leaving her feeling unwanted in both her mother’s and father’s families. “I'm an outside child for both parents. So my stepdad thought I was an additional bill to the family, and because of lack of support from my dad for me, my mom was frustrated,” Smikle told Observer Online. What’s worse, she said she was sexually abused by a close male relative when she was a young child. “It was painful. I live years of being bitter, but I'm grateful that God allowed me to surpass that part of my life where I can face him and talk to him… I am at peace with what he did to me, and he apologised to me some years ago, and I find peace within my heart to just move forward,” the now 39-year-old said. Smikle was just 13 years old when her mother left her at the Spanish Town Police Station amid family difficulties which resulted in her becoming a ward of the state and being placed at Glenhope Place of Safety on Maxfield Avenue in St Andrew. She spent her early teenage years at Glenhope Place of Safety before being transferred to Windsor Girls' Home in St Ann.

Smikle recalled the sadness of spending Christmas and Mother's Day in state care while other children returned home to their families. “When Christmas comes around and Mother's Day and all those kind of special moments, it brings me sadness because everybody's getting the chance of going home to a family and I have to stay in the system because I got nowhere to go,” she said. She said she was regarded as one of the worst children in state care. She also recalled hurtful comments from some staff members who told her that she would never amount to anything. It was the support of mentors and church groups that helped her gradually overcome her anger and learn to accept love and care from others, Smikle said. Among those she said made a lasting impact on her was Dr Winklet-Gallimore of Church on the Rock in St Andrew, who continued to mentor and support her even after she was transferred to Windsor Girls' Home in St Ann. “We normally write letters to each other, and there were other church family groups like Faith Chapel in Kingston, Andre Grizzle and the church team, and also the St Ann's Bay Seventh-day Adventist Church, Mr Paddyfoot and the church family there. They always come around and do devotions with us and take us out a little bit,” she recalled. After leaving state care, Smikle said she experienced a period of homelessness before she was encouraged to join the Jamaica Constabulary Force (JCF) while she was a member of the Police Youth Club in Stony Hill, her place of birth. She credited Miss Peer Roberts, who tutored and mentored her, with helping her through that difficult period. “I was tutored by Miss Peer Roberts. I was going through a season of being broken and being uncared for, and she took me under her wings and guided me. I want to tell you that once a mother will always be a mother, and a real mother will never only be a mother to their children,” Smikle said. Although she had no Caribbean Secondary Education Certificate (CSEC) subjects at the time, she said Roberts and a police inspector encouraged her to pursue a career in the force while continuing her education. Smikle served in the JCF for over 13 years. However, her career was marked by a difficult experience in 2018, when she claimed she was assaulted by a colleague during a dispute involving her car. She alleged that she was subsequently criminally charged because she refused to become romantically involved with a supervisor in her division. “Is either I'm involved intimately with this officer or I've just faced the justice system, and I decided to face the justice system. And out of it, my case was dismissed from the court because of inconsistency in the evidence that the police brought as their testimony,” she said. After the case was dismissed, Smikle said she sought legal representation to pursue a lawsuit against the JCF, believing she had become a victim of the institution she had sworn to serve and protect. However, she alleged that the law firm she retained failed to advance her case for about two years, causing it to become statute-barred. “I paid $200,000-something to retain the service, and he refused to refund me my money. And I'm like, you know what? I forgive you, sir,” she said. Smikle resigned from the JCF in 2023 and later migrated to Florida, where she pursued studies at American Military University. She earned a bachelor's degree and a master's degree, the latter in global security. Her academic achievements also led to her nomination to the institution's National Leadership Society. She also received US Congressional recognition for her community service within the diaspora. Through her book Grace Beyond Brokenness, Smikle shares her journey with her readers from her upbringing in state care to her years serving in the JCF and the woman she has become. “I wrote my book just to remind people of their true purpose in life, never to settle for where they are, but just keep rising and keep going forward and keep believing in who they were born and destined to be. It's not what people say about us individuals that matter, but what God thinks and who God predestined you to be,” she said. She said the book includes affirmations, biblical scriptures and aspects of her personal journey. Smikle is also promoting Grace Beyond Brokenness: An Evening of Worship Jamaica Edition, scheduled for December 5, 2026, at Grace Apostolic Deliverance Tabernacle in Kingston, and December 6, 2026, at Fingers from the Heart Ministry in Spanish Town. She said the events are intended to bring people together in worship and thanksgiving, while sharing the message that faith and grace can help people endure life's most difficult seasons.