Shenseea finds freedom in growth

“I feel like it’s better to be judged than not experience something at all,” said international recording artiste Shenseea. For her, those words represent more than a change in perspective. They capture a personal turning point, one that required her to confront the things she had kept buried. It is this willingness to let go, to embrace the uncomfortable, and allow listeners access to a more unguarded side of her, that gives her latest EP, Catalyst, its emotional centre. The eight-track project, which will be released today, Friday, November 6, finds the artiste reflecting on how far she has travelled, while making room for the woman she is still becoming. Rather than abandoning the sounds and personality that first endeared her to audiences, Shenseea sees the release as an opportunity to reconnect with those foundations while moving confidently into another phase of her career. At the heart of that journey is Vulnerability, a deeply personal offering that she describes as one of the most creatively fulfilling songs she has recorded. “Vulnerability is the one song I really felt like I was putting it all out there on, for sure. It’s definitely in my top five of most creative songs ever, because it’s my most vulnerable song. Of all the records that I’ve put out, you’ve never heard me sing like that before, or say the stuff that I’m saying. It came straight from the heart,” she told the Jamaica Observer’s Splash. For an artiste accustomed to commanding attention through her confident delivery and larger-than-life performances, allowing that level of emotional exposure was not necessarily an easy decision. However, she had reached a point at which keeping her thoughts and experiences to herself was beginning to take a toll on her creativity. There were things she wanted to communicate to her audience, experiences she wanted to put into context, and parts of her story she felt had remained misunderstood. Yet, in trying to keep those feelings contained, she was inadvertently creating a barrier between herself and the music. “I had so much on my mind, so much I wanted to say to the people, letting them know what went down, giving them behind-the-scenes of why things are happening, and why I am how I am. I was holding it in and mi just couldn’t focus creatively. It was draining the life out of me. I couldn’t get to put it in my music and I couldn’t have fun with the music because I was so bothered personally,” she explained. Eventually, she realised that the freedom she needed could only come from laying it all out on a track. “I had to put it out there just to clear up myself and, honestly, ever since I released that track I feel so liberated and free,” she said. The response from listeners further affirmed her decision, with many recognising the significance of seeing an otherwise guarded side of the artiste. “I think people really took from it that, ‘Wow, she really let it all out,’ and that’s what it was made for,” she added. That sense of liberation is central to the thinking behind Catalyst, whose title reflects Shenseea’s recognition that meaningful growth cannot be rushed. Looking back at the earlier stages of her career, she acknowledges that her ambition sometimes made her eager to reach the destination without fully appreciating the experiences required to get there. Knowing the heights she wanted to achieve, she admits that she sometimes overlooked the importance of the journey itself. “Earlier on in my career, there is a lesson I learnt. It’s that you cannot change from point A to Z without going through the rest of the alphabet, and I feel like I took that leap,” she said. “Being young and in the industry and knowing where I wanted to go, it was like I didn’t remember that I couldn’t do it all at once. That’s what helped me to make Catalyst, because I felt like I needed to take those steps that I felt like I stepped over. “I felt like I missed some steps and Catalyst is me trying to make the smoothest transition into a new phase without changing me entirely,” she added. It is a perspective that speaks to an artiste who is increasingly comfortable with the idea that evolution does not require abandoning one’s identity. Having explored different sounds and audiences throughout her career, Shenseea is now interested in bringing the different chapters of her musical journey into conversation with each other. “The version of me that you’re getting on this EP is the Shenyeng Anthem mixed with Lighter Shenseea. Mi feel like it’s going to show where I’m coming from, you’ll feel the nostalgia. It’s also going to show where we are currently, and where we’re headed,” she said. That connection to her beginnings is particularly important as she reflects on her personal growth; personally and artistically. “Everything that I have said to myself that this is how I see myself in the future at this age, doing this, singing this, at this level, I am doing it right now,” she said. “So every other thing that I wanna accomplish is literally just for young Shenseea before the artistry begun. Just me listening to the music and deciding I wanted to become an international superstar. I am very proud of myself.” The journey, however, has not been without its difficult moments. Shenseea acknowledged experiencing a period of depression that was unfamiliar to her and left her questioning herself in ways she had not previously experienced. With the help of God, and those around her, she said she was able to navigate that chapter and arrive at a place of greater contentment. “This is how I felt when I just started out and this is why this project is so important to me. I feel like I’m starting over, but phase two,” she explained. That renewed outlook has also influenced her relationship with music itself. While the pursuit of international recognition and industry accolades formed part of the ambition that propelled her forward, she is now placing greater emphasis on the simple pleasure of creating. “I really had to bring back some stuff that makes me feel like I have to go hard, and that includes doing music for the love and not just for a submission or accolades. The music I am doing now is because I literally have fun doing them, I am in love with them, and I want to share them with the world,” she said. The shift comes alongside another chapter in her professional journey, following a change in management as she continues to navigate the demands of an international career. For Shenseea, the transition is another reminder that growth sometimes requires accepting that certain people and circumstances are only meant to accompany you for a portion of the journey. “I feel like nothing happens before its time, and one thing I had to sit with is that not everyone who started the journey with you, is meant to finish it with you,” she told Splash. “Stuff happens along the way and you can either decide to be like this is it, or you choose something or someone who will help you carry on your journey further. I feel like everything is just God. His timing is so impeccable, and I can’t argue with that. I have the drive in me to keep going and that’s what I’m going to do.” Catalyst is now available for streaming across all digital platforms.